I went to Pinterest this morning to find a funny picture/quote to throw up on Facebook, to wish all my friends and family members with a Y chromosome who are also dads a Happy Fathers Day.
Holy DNA, Batman. The seething rage I found! I mean, funny’s funny because it’s based on truth (they say) but sometimes funny is just mean…or full of angry pain. And angry pain can be funny…if there’s a sense of self and irony and a general we’re-all-in-this-together-we’re-going-to-be-okay to it. Which is why I didn’t laugh at a single one of my options for Father’s Day Pinterest pins, because I didn’t see any of that; I just read hurt and pain.
The things humans do to one another.
I also feel like it’s important to note that when I went back to Pinterest on my laptop to download these items of pain so I could write about them here, I had to do a hard search to find them. They were only easily available via phone. Isn’t that interesting, too? Regular computer users get love and humor, people hunched over their phones find pain and anger. I feel like there’s an important algorithm of human connection there, but I’m not awake or mathematically-inclined enough to delve into it right now. If you’re a scientist and reading this, will you do me a big favor and try to figure it out? You may find a cure for psychopathy and stuff. (Therapists everywhere are scrambling right now to figure out how to keep that from happening.)
At any rate. Here’s a sampling of what my eyes and heart experienced:
See the angry pain? Fathers, put a condom on it if you’re not going to be there.
To balance that out, here are some good dad stories. All the dads I know happen to be GOOD dads. I don’t know any deadbeat dads, absentee fathers, or dads in jail. I know all good men. And that’s important, I think.
Here’s a fun story about one good dad I know (my brother): Every time my niece and nephew pass by this Japanese chain restaurant near where they live called Ichiban, he’s Pavlovian conditioned them to say: “The lipstick for men.” I rode in a car with them once and we casually used it in our conversation and, sure enough, every time one of us said “Ichiban,” from the back of the car without even missing a beat, my nephew murmured, “The lipstick for men.” It amused me to no end.
And here’s Miss M as a baby, the day I let my brother and his best friend babysit her. They took her to the grocery store and slapped a sticker on her head. Because dads in grocery stores.
Happy Father’s Day, if you’re a dad. I wish mine were still here. If you’d like to read about how much I wish mine were still here, you can go HERE and learn all about him.